A Writer’s Prayer

By Martin Golan


Sitting in the uptown Starbucks
thinking of the travails I’ve had
after a long and introspective walk
grappling with the absolute certainty
that I wasted my entire life

I take the time to enumerate every mistake
The chances lost, the messes left behind
even how stupid it is
to wallow in self-pity
as I’m doing now

I know I should be writing but my mind
is too full of connections, too in touch with fear
and hurt and loss, too angry that I’m writing this
instead of really writing

And as I meticulously detail my grief I whisper this prayer:

Dear Writing Gods
If I must drown in misery
be awash in despair
beat my ego to a bloody pulp
Please, please, please, I beg of you
Let all this pain
This endless torment
This unspeakable anguish
be something
I can use

Learn more about Martin Golan at http://martingolan.com